


The Empire Strikes Back

by roane



Series: Luke's Epiphany [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Gen, Guilt, Parent-Child Relationship, Speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-09 19:30:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5552462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roane/pseuds/roane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You're him." Her voice was soft and wondering. "It really is you. You're real."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Empire Strikes Back

In the end, Luke took the lightsaber from her. Not with the Force, although she stood far enough away that seemed to be what she wanted. No, in the end, he walked to her, his legs gone unsteady with unfamiliar emotion. 

_Why didn't you tell me?_ How many times would he have to ask that question about his own family? Why did the galaxy seem to conspire to keep him away from the ones who should have loved him best? 

There was no question who the girl's mother was. Only one possibility, even if her mother's features hadn't been stamped clearly on the girl's face. Those eyes were impossible to forget, along with that deceptively small frame.

And there was no question who the girl's father was.

 _Why didn't you_ tell _me?_

When he took the lightsaber, his hands didn't shake, although the familiar sensation of the metal beneath the flesh that remained to him combined with the ache of his joints to create something new and unfamiliar. 

"You're him." Her voice was soft and wondering. "It really is you. You're real."

It took him too long to speak. The habit of speech had long since faded here in his exile, and what could he say? What could his first words to her be? 

"You found me." His voice was almost unrecognizable to his own ears, rusty and old. 

"We need you." She seemed about to say more, youthful impatience brimming from her, but she stopped, nearly trembling with the effort to keep still. The power that emanated from her was unlike any he'd seen before. Even Ben, as powerful as he was, hadn't shown such raw, unbridled potential. 

_She needs a teacher_. Obi-Wan in his head again. Luke recoiled from the implication. No.

He met her eyes, realized she was waiting for him to speak again. "What's your name?"

"Rey." No surname, no honorific. 

Luke looked away, blinking against eyes that stung suddenly, like he was caught in a sandstorm. He focused on the weapon in his hand until the feeling went away. "I'll come with you, Rey."

He'd known Leia would find the map eventually. It was his way of leaving the choice in her hands. Letting her decide when or if to see him again, after what he'd cost her. _(Everything.)_

Gathering the few belongings he had didn't take long. He bundled them together, dreading the long climb down to the _Falcon_ with each passing moment. Rey practically vibrated with energy while she waited for him. So much like him at that age. He still had vivid memories of sitting behind the pilot's seat of the _Falcon_ for the first time, wide-eyed and ready for any adventure. The girl was a little more seasoned than he had been, but no less ready for adventure.

They started the climb down side by side in silence. What could he say to her?

 _I am your father_.

Not those words. Never those words. The shock of hearing those words still reverberated within him, forever associated with agony, betrayal, despair. The Dark Side.

That one moment had forever altered his life, more than any other. More than discovering the Force, more than learning about his sister. More than anything. It had turned his world around on its axis, and forced him to accept that he was not the man he thought he was--and that he never would be. Even now, decades later, the Empire's shadow still fell on Luke heavy as a physical blow, a strike to his heart.

When he was a child, he'd dreamed of nothing more than becoming a great pilot like his father. When he met Obi-Wan Kenobi, he wanted nothing more than to become a Jedi like his father. And when his life hung by a thread on Bespin, he'd prayed desperately for a chance to avoid becoming his father.

He'd sworn off attachments, determined not to make Anakin's mistakes. He'd been so careful. But in the end, he was only human. The affair was short, doomed from the start, and then she was gone.

Did he really need to ask why she hadn't told him about his daughter?

He expected the girl to bombard him with questions, but she seemed to understand the need for silence, and left him to his thoughts. By the time they'd reached the water's edge, the only decision he'd made was not to decide at all.

He couldn't tell her. Not yet. The time was wrong.

He'd go home with her for now. Face Leia again. Start trying to find a way to make up for all of his mistakes, his father's mistakes.

There was still time. Perhaps one Skywalker child was lost, but one had found her way home against all odds, and Luke was determined to do right by her.


End file.
